Navigating Uncertain Times: Two Steps to Create Calm
Whether in private or group sessions, email, text, or DM, I’m hearing from many of you and a theme is starting to emerge. There's an undercurrent of worry, overwhelm, disbelief, and even outrage about the state of the world.
Things feel scary right now. For many of you, that heaviness isn’t just something you feel—it’s something you’re carrying every minute of every day. The concerns you’ve shared with me aren’t small; they’re deeply impactful, life-altering things.
You’re worried about:
Your livelihood, and whether your family’s future is secure.
Your health and that of your children
The gap between the world you imagined for your kids and the world we’re living in now.
You're not alone. I feel it too.
I remember feeling similarly at the start of the pandemic. The world felt so uncertain. I found myself spiraling often about all my worst fears coming true. Looking back on it, that response made sense. I was navigating something novel, uncertain, even life-threatening. We all were. And my brain's negativity bias ensured I focused more on all the potential negative outcomes more so than the positive.
Past Experience is Lacking
As we encounter uncertainty in our lives, we look to our past for guidance. We may leverage past successes and/or failures to help us navigate the present challenge. But absent prior experience, we're left to chart a course forward on our own. Some of us rely upon a mindset of possibility and creativity, while others lean on fear and anxiety. Many of us vacillate between both positive and negative emotions.
Chance or divine experiences can also influence our perspective, as was true for me during the pandemic. At the beginning of the pandemic, tensions were high and the uncertainty was thick. About two weeks into the lockdown, a bird decided to nest in a wreath that adorned my front door. At first, watching her build her nest was a welcome distraction, and her birdsong an invitation for joy. But at some point in the process, her efforts became much more than fragmented moments of peace. Watching her made me realize that life all around us continued on. She, and the entire universe, were blissfully unaware of the terror we were experiencing. Her presence grounded me in the present and came to symbolize hope.
The uncertainty we feel right now is familiar. For some, the weight of it feels unbearable. Others feel the need to act, while some are doing everything they can to disengage to protect their mental wellbeing. We’re all experiencing this moment in our own ways.
No matter where you are on this spectrum, there is no right or wrong way to feel.
The truth is, we all cope differently when our world feels like it’s falling apart. But in those moments, when everything seems overwhelming or out of control, there are two things I’ve found that help anchor me that I want to share with you:
Practicing Gratitude
Tacking Action
Finding Gratitude Amid Chaos
I know it might feel strange to talk about gratitude when everything feels so hard. But gratitude isn’t about pretending everything’s fine. It’s about making room for the things that are still good, even when the world feels like it’s crumbling. Doing so strengthens our capacity to deal with challenge and builds resilience for the future.
Gratitude grounds us in the present moment. It reminds us that no matter how uncertain the future feels, beauty and joy exist right here, right now. Whether it’s a fleeting moment of joy with your child, a sunset, or a bird nesting on your front door, these things matter. They remind us that even in the storm, there’s still light available--if we're willing to see it.
Gratitude doesn’t erase the hard things. Rather, it gives us a moment to breathe and find balance in a world that feels tilted.
Taking Action—Big or Small
After we ground ourselves in gratitude, the next step is to gain clarity on what’s within our control. When the world feels chaotic, it’s easy to get lost in the noise of things we have no power over. But there’s always something we can do.
The actions we take don’t have to be grand gestures. Sometimes, they’re small, quiet decisions that happen inside our homes. Maybe it’s how we show up for our kids, how we maintain a sense of normalcy in our family life, or how we talk about what’s happening in the world with those closest to us. Maybe it’s setting boundaries to protect our mental wellbeing.
Other times, the action might feel bigger or more outwardly visible. That may be volunteering in your community, donating to a cause that resonates with you, or getting involved in advocacy work. Perhaps it’s using your voice to stand up for what matters most to you.
There’s no one-size-fits-all approach. And, it's not an either/or decision. You may find yourself wanting to isolate for a bit to tend to yourself and your needs, and that of your family. And when you feel sustained and supported, you might decide it's time to advocate. Learn your cues and honor them. What matters is that you focus on what you can control and what you feel called to do—whether that’s your mindset, your reactions, or your actions. Even when the world feels like it’s spinning out of control, you still have the power to decide how you show up for yourself, your family, and your community.
Selfish Reflections
Life is a manual of sorts, and we are the authors. Our relationships and experiences provide the stories we capture and the meaning we apply to them. Uncertainty is a given in this life. We won't always be prepared for all that comes our way. I actually believe that's the very point of this life. And while there are many experiences we'd rather not have, we aren't always in control. Life is a dance with the Universe. And the sooner we learn how to dance to songs we don't know, the more agile and adaptable we become.
I know it’s not easy to find your footing right now. The instability, the fear, the uncertainty—it’s a lot to hold. But you don’t have to carry it alone, and you don’t have to figure everything out right away.
Start small. Practice gratitude for what’s good in your life, however small or fleeting those moments may be. Then, get clear on what you can control and decide how you want to move forward. Whether your action is inward or outward, it’s valid. It’s enough.
We’re all in this together, and together, we can navigate through whatever comes next—one step, one action, one moment at a time. If you’d like additional support, reach out to me to book a complimentary call.
